Motivational "Check"

These verses hit me square between the eyes the other day. I've been meditating on them ever since...

"And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. May you be srengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy, giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light." ~ Colossians 1:9-12 ~

I italicized the part that struck me hardest of all.

I am a distracted young woman - I'm just going to type it out-loud. As the Lord begins to fingerpoint more and more areas of my life that need gutting and restructuring, one of His biggest projects with me involves my motives and intentions. It can be towards friends, family, men, women, circumstances - you name it; but in almost every aspect of my existence, I find myself battling with one enduring question: is how I am thinking and behaving right now out of obedience to God or enslavement to flesh?

So often my focus supplies my motivation, and - unfortunately - so often that focus is not upon the Father as it needs to be. I discover myself trying to scheme feeble attempts to force what I desire to happen in my life (with people, in different situations, for my future...). I am so thankful that the Lord is so intentional to check me by His Spirit every time; and the other day, he checked me through Colossians.

Do we live our lives - day in and day out - motivated as Paul writes about in the first chapter of Colossians? Is the reason why we are loving people, serving people, praying for people, and acting in obedience because we truly understand that it is the Lord's generous "qualification" that has deemed us worthy for eternal life? Do we allow our greatest joy (particularly in times of patient endurance) to flow from the thankfulness that God has shown us such grace through Jesus?

I know the majority of the time I don't. Yet, I am humbled once again when I realize that as I chew on this verse these next days and weeks: God is working. If I bear any fruit, it's because He is faithful to sow His seeds. If I think any differently, it's because He is longsuffering to renew my warped mind. And if I love any better, it's only because He graciously loves through me.

And quite frankly... I find that motivational.